Message From The Author

Author's Message

Michele Bardsley


How to Investigate Paranormal Occurrences in Broken Heart, OK

By Libby Monroe

Member, Paranormal Research and Investigation Services

1. In the dead night, sneak up on the guy tending a grave in the creepy cemetery. Try not to freak out when he uses his sexy Vlad voice to command you. (Yeah. As if.)

2. When chased by snarling, ravenous werewolves, run very, very fast. Leap into vampire's strong arms and scream for help. (Ignore vampire's attempts to calm you.)

3. Outmaneuvering zombies is easy. Just walk fast and disregard all moaning and slurping sounds. (P.S., No Tic Tac in the world is strong enough to kill zombie halitosis.)

4. Dragon battles involve fire. Lots and lots of fire. If you're not made of asbestos, get your ass out of the way. (Your eyebrows will grow back eventually.)

5. Should the vampire queen and her lycan consort imprison you because, say, you accidentally got dragon powers and fried her living room -- just do your time. Quietly. (No, really. Shhh.)

6. If a sexy vampire continues to rescue you from nefarious situations, thank him appropriately. (Naked is optional.)

7. Confronted by an ancient vampire with a bad attitude and worse fashion sense? Fireballs and snarky comments about her attire are definitely in order. (Red leather, not a good look.)

8. Dark mages would rather pluck out your eyeballs and peel off your skin than chitchat. (Run, you idiot.)

9. Enjoy having a soul? Then stay away from Ash, who eats them like Godiva truffles. (Nom, nom, nom.)

10. If a gorgeous vampire daddy to two adorable twins tries to fight off dark mages, soul-eaters and dragons for you ... he just may be a keeper. (Note to self: Put the kids to bed early.)

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