At last it’s time for season two of those campy witches with the amazing hair, the Witches of East End! First off, I’d like to thank Lifetime for moving the ladies to a 9 p.m. time slot because I am old and I appreciate them respecting my bedtime.
There’s tons of exposition this episode in addition to your usual supernatural hijinx, and then a sexy ending that had me clutching my metaphorical pearls.
So let’s get to it, shall we? We begin with a veritable clip show from season one: The girls found out they were cursed witches! Freya had two brothers fighting over her. There were lots of past lives and kicky flashbacks with wigs. Cat-shifter Aunt Wendy was awesome. The girls met their dad — and found out about their long lost brother, and the world, Asgard, their mom and aunt left behind. The portal opened.
And we’re off!
We open in a forest, with a cat skulking around, a shadow chasing behind. Aunt Wendy shifts into human form and looks around furtively. Be careful, Wendy, you’re on your last life!
Freya, in our first lingerie sighting of the season, casts a spell complete with green flame.
Oh! Kinky alert! (This will be a theme. Trust me.) Upstairs, Joanna is tied to the bed and Victor smolders as he takes off his belt. Wocka wocka. (Does EL James get a cut of this?) Except then Victor takes out a knife and cuts Jo. She screams.