RT 2016 Convention: Beyond BDSM: Top Five Tips For Writing BDSM

The RT Booklovers' Convention is in full swing and besides having an absolutely amazing time at all the fabulous parties, we are learning a lot about writing romance! Yesterday moderator Angel Payne and panelists Eden BradleyJenna Jacob and Sean Jacob brought us Beyond BDSM, an event addressing stereotypes in kink and techniques for presenting readers with an appealing and authentic experience. We asked our experts to share their top five tips for writing BDSM, and boy, did they deliver!

1.Understand why your characters seek out BDSM
 Motivation is everything! Your scenes must feel authentic to the reader and give them some grasp of the psychology behind kink, so they can relate to characters under extreme conditions.
2.BDSM is not all about sex! 
 It’s about connection, power exchange, what goes on in the mind, as well as the body—it’s more than the dominant swinging a flogger. Where is everyone emotionally? Many people "play" with zero sexual contact, but if there’s going to be sex, they should discuss it—as well as any kink activities—before anything happens. Responsible kink is all about consent. And a negotiation scene can be hot!
 
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3.Utilize the five senses in writing a kinky scene. 
 This is important in any scene, but showing sensory response will build sensuality and demonstrate emotion. Explore how these extreme acts can make for vulnerable moments, and use that to show how your characters handle things, revealing much about who they are to your reader — and to each other.
 
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4.You don't have to practice BDSM in order to write it, but like anything else, do your research!
 There are many wonderful resources available—just be sure to consider the source. Some of our favorite “how-to” books are: Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns and The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book.
 
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5.Don’t be afraid to incorporate humor into your kink!
 Humor and BDSM can go hand in hand, and the most intimidating Doms often display the most ironic and wicked sense of humor when they’re playing their victims—er, I mean their subs. (For instance, when they play A Great Big World’s Say Something on the iPod while their sub is drooling around the ball gag in her mouth.) Humor in a kink scene can break up the tension and deepen the connection between your characters. Have some fun with it, because those of us in the scene certainly do!  
 
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With such great advice, you're all bound to become BDSM author-extraordinaires! We've got to get back on the convention floor, but be sure to stay tuned to the RT blog to see what's happening at Convention. Of course, you can also expect to find all of your favorite weekday features including Tweethearts: Convention Edition!

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